Why you should stop repeating positive affirmations when you’re struggling with acne

Have you ever been frustrated or discouraged by repeating mantras to yourself like “I am beautiful”, “I love myself”, “Acne is beautiful” in the mirror?

Me too.

When I had full-blown cystic acne, I read a book called You Can Heal Your Life. In it, the “prescription” for healing acne was to repeat the phrase “I love and accept myself.”

So I did.

Every single day, from morning to night, whenever I looked at the reflection of myself in the mirror, I said loudly and proudly: “I love and accept myself.”

But the truth is… I felt like a fraud.

Because no matter how many times I repeated the mantra, I didn’t actually believe it.

And it only made me feel worse because it felt like I was just lying to myself.

Nowadays on Instagram, I often see skinfluencers posting things about how you should love yourself and the skin you’re in.

And while I think the intention behind the message is great, here’s why I have a fundamental issue with it:

According to research, if your existing self-esteem is already lower than the average, repeating positive affirmations about yourself can actually LOWER your self-esteem even further.

It can backfire at you leaving you feeling even worse about yourself. (So this explains what was going on for me in the example I shared earlier.)

When you’re already feeling down & low (aka most of us struggling with acne), this can be a slippery slope.

And this is a common mistake I see a LOT of my clients make — trying to go from 0 to 100 right away.

Think about it this way.

If you’re going to the gym for the first time, do you start lifting 100lb weights right away?

Probably not, because then you’ll injure yourself pretty badly.

Instead, you’ll likely start with 2lb weights first, and then work your way up towards 5lb ones, then 10lb ones gradually.

You build up your muscles for the heavier weights with practice and consistency.

The same is true for mindset work and our own narrative about ourselves.

You can’t go from hating the reflection of yourself in the mirror for months/years to all of a sudden telling yourself that you love yourself and that you look beautiful.

That’s too big of a jump.

So here’s what you need to do instead (hint: we’re taking baby steps):

First, meet yourself where you’re at.

Get really honest with yourself. How do you talk to yourself right now? What’s the first thought that comes to mind when you look at yourself in the mirror?

Second, choose thoughts that feel just slightly better (or slightly less crappy).

Third, practice telling yourself that rather than something that is too far out of reach.

Remember that taking baby steps, no matter how small, leads to progress and growth.

Each small step you take will bring you closer to ultimately believing one day ‘Oh yeah, of course I love myself. Dang, I am BEAUTIFUL!’ and believe every ounce of it in your bones.

"Little by little, a little becomes a lot."

If I were to re-write the “prescription” mantra for healing acne right now, I would have you pick from one of my Believable Mantra series I created for you.

XO,

Lydia - Your Coach & Safe Space🤍